one_long_mission

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He's a wanderer.

Ever since the traumatic day when everything was taken from him, he's been a wanderer. Nothing more, nothing less. A shinobi? Only in the barest terms. A crimson band of cloth covers the ruin of his sockets, hiding the shame from the world; his memories of receiving basic medical care from a civilian village are fogged by the fever that ravaged him during those days.

Ever since then, he's wandered. Slowly learning to survive, slowly adapting, he now moves with some trace of his old grace and confidence, as though he has some perception of the world beyond the reach of his hands. The snakes have taught him, and experience, the slow and bitter sensei, has taught him.

But he will never again be what he once was.

He's entering another village, he knows that; where it is, what its name is, he doesn't know. Doesn't entirely care. Perhaps they'll feed him, perhaps he can trade some manual labor for a few coins, and then move on again. That's all he can hope for anymore.

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Training. He was training... trying to just walk and make this paper stick on his forehead shouldn't be so hard. He can actually hold it there with chakra for the best part of a half-hour, but Sakumo clearly asked for -an hour- and stated he should also be able to do it while going through any activity.

"darn!" came the hiss as the paper unstuck... and then a groan as it flew in the wind... and landed near someone with... a headband hiding his eyes? He went over to retrieve the paper and looked up.

"Hello mister!" came an overly happy chirpy voice.

A child; Sasuke's flickering chakra, the faintest brush that a little one probably would not even feel, told him that much, but couldn't tell him much more. He had no way to recognize that it was his own features, baby-round, looking at him; his memory of what he looked like at such an age was not good enough.

He considered ignoring, walking by, but he was disoriented, unsure. So instead, he paused. "Child. What village is this?"

"This here's Michi no Sato" he quipped happily. "I still gotta explore lotsa the village still, but if you want help getting anywhere, I'll try my best!" he always, always did try his very best.

Michi no Sato? He had not heard of such a village before. But it didn't seem to be a hidden village, he guessed, by the lack of -gakure in the name, and keeping track of civilian villages had never been a priority.

"Is there anyone who would pay for work, or trade for food and supplies?" That was all he needed, really, and then he would move on. There was nowhere to stop for him, not anymore.

"...hmm..." the youth gave a frowny face as he thought hard. "Ah! Niisan gave me stuff to do, maybe he can give you things you can do too!" he offered a wide smile. "....where's he s'possed to be though? Ah darn!" he stomped at the ground in frustration.

What to do, what to do? "Y'missed the caravans that came by too, maybe they woulda liked tradin..."

Caravans? That would have been useful, yes. But he had passed beyond hopes or dreams or what-ifs. There was only now, and this child. Something about his voice... about the way he spoke of his big brother. Maybe it was simply Sasuke's touchiness on that regard, but...

Well. It was a place to start. "Bring me to him, then." A pause, and he added, "...What is your name, child?"

"ah right.. that place was over there, somewhere on th'edge of the village." he stated half to himself. At least he somewhat remembered where the Hokage was. He -had- been told to report there, with his progress among the children here.

"I'm Sasuke~" it truly -was-a happy chirp more than anything. "Uchiha Sasuke or at least.. guess I should say the youngest of'ems.. s'gettin kinda confusin" he groaned lightly.

Uchiha Sasuke.

No. It couldn't be. He was Uchiha Sasuke. This child couldn't be...

"What do you mean?" he gritted out of a suddenly-tight throat. "Explain yourself, boy."

"Hmm.. well, s'gonna sound weird, but that's how it is." he shook his head, a movement unseen. "There's other people sharin my name here. This village..uh.. how did neesan say? It's like people got taken from lotsa places and even dif'rent times. Like there's me. There's also me from, uh... like five years into the future. Just like there's a Niisan that's niichan really, cause he's about as old as I am, and there's also a really older niisan, and... uh.." he scratched his head. "...does that make sense...?" he asked, glancing up.

Niisan.

A word that was bitter ashes in his mouth, in his mind. The Niisan who'd all too clearly only left him alive as spare parts was here, and Sasuke could take back what was rightfully his...

... But wait. If they were from different times, different places...

No, he wanted to say. None of it makes sense. But admitting ignorance choked in his throat, and the idea that a child could lecture him on such things was worse.

"Yes," he said instead. "It does."

"Yaaay!" there was an overjoyed, happy screech. "I 'xplained it good 'nough this time!" and he had been able to keep that paper stuck to his forehead while doing it too, but by now that wasn't hard.

"Say, say!" he asked, full of childish enthusiasm. "Who're you?" it might have been the dreaded question.

He wanted to lie. Didn't want to claim a sameness to this child, to be forced to admit what the path of his life had brought him to.

And yet... and yet, to lie troubled him. Perhaps this one could be saved...

When he spoke, his voice held a dark, sharp note. Pain. "Uchiha Sasuke."

"...." the paper he'd been attaching onto his forehead with chakra fell, blown by the wind, and he stared up.

Uchiha Sasuke.
The concept of future selves was something he had become familiar with here, but to see such a thing? See himself, his future self... like this?

He wanted to ask what happened, but decided against it. He could change nothing. All he could do...
"....say..." his voice was a tiny broken chirp. "...can I hug you?" Normally he didn't ask and just did it, but...

Hug him? What was this, pity from a child? Sasuke didn't need such a thing. He had his pride, battered and damaged as he was now.

And yet, instead of 'no,' he found himself saying, "If you want." Not quite a welcome, but not a rebuff either. This child would have a long life of backs turned on him, Sasuke told himself.

The boy did just that, and soon found his body shaking.

This was himself... from the future. He had been told that bad things happened to him, and he had met his 13-year old self first. He did not look that bad off, and even taught him a jutsu. He had his girl-self too, and she might have been somewhat grumpy, but still...

Why did this future self make him feel so cold inside? He wasn't even sure what that feeling was. He valiantly tried to stop tears, squeezing his eyes shut. He wasn't going to cry. He wasn't! Why would he do that?
Probably because he felt a huge lump in his throat as he wondered just what was in store for him once he disappeared from here... and went back to where he had gotten torn from.

"I dun' wanna go back" he whimpered in a shaky voice.

"No," Sasuke answered, his voice low and with an oddly gentle note that he didn't entirely intend. "You don't." Because this was what awaited the child. This hideousness -- discovering that everything he'd believed was nothing more than lies, that the only purpose to his life was to be spare parts for a brother who'd never, ever cared about him.

He wasn't even sure what this feeling was. It was close to fear, and equally close to sadness, with a pinch of denial and a dash of hopelessness.

Tiny arms gripped with a fierce despair, as if he would fall into a deep, endless dark pit if he let go.
There were so many thoughts running through his mind, and he was too young to even comprehend some of what flashed by. He could ask why, could ask how... but instead he remained silent, light sniffles escaping him.

Maybe terrifying the child hadn't been the right way to handle things. But Sasuke had had enough to pain and fear in his life that the thought held little weight. Let him get used to it now. It will make things easier in the future.

After all, what more than this did he have to look forward to?

But he didn't push the boy away, didn't try to reject the innocent attempt at connection. A touch was... rare, was perhaps something a little special. Something to be treasured. One hand came to rest lightly between the child's shoulderblades, a tentative attempt at comfort.

Terror? Was that what he felt? No wonder he couldn't even put a word on it. He'd never even felt anything remotely close to that.

That hand upon his small back did little to stop the sniffling. He was oh so bravely trying to not cry at the overwhelmingly strange, alien feeling in his little chest.
He tried to speak, but when just a broken whimper got out, he gave up on the attempt. Whatever words he may have been able to form at the moment might have been worse than silence. For now, he hugged his future self a fraction tighter as his body trembled.

What he had here... in his hands... was the future...

It was a long moment that Sasuke let his younger self cling to him, feeling the tremors in that small body, knowing the child was frightened and torn between an equal unwillingness to deepen his distress, or to lie to him and sugarcoat the looming darkness to come.

Finally, though, his stomach growled, reminding him how long it had been since he'd eaten. He would need to find some kind of food... and some way to pay for it.

The noise shocked him, and he drew back. "..I-if you.. wanna.. there's food... home" he managed to say, and then added, "I can.. get you there..."

"I don't want charity." The words were automatic, though less harsh than they would have been had he addressed anyone else. But he was hungry...

"If there is something that needs doing, I can still work in exchange for food," he added. No charity, no pity, should be spent on him. He was not disabled, not helpless. Just... blind.

Work in exchange for food? He said he didn't want charity. Would home be bad then? "..but... my family's your family, right? families... help each other. It isn't charity..."

Family. He didn't have any family. But this child did... how was any of this possible?

Insane, he decided to himself. I've gone insane. Perhaps he was still wandering in the wilderness somewhere, his fever unchecked, hallucinating as he died by degrees.

If so, then what difference did anything make? It wasn't as though anyone cared about him anymore. He might as well go along with the hallucination until it faded.

That said, though, he still had his pride. "I don't want to rely on anyone's generosity," he said simply. "I'm old enough to take care of myself."

"..." there was silence for a long while, dark eyes staring down at the packed earth at their feet. "...not just this once?" he tried not to make it sound like a plea. "...takin it easy... just for a few minutes isn't wrong." he bit his lip. "I can make omusubi.... and it's not cause you can't take care of yourself, it's... cause I wanna make it for you.""

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