one_long_mission | [closed] eyes i dare not meet in dreams

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[closed] eyes i dare not meet in dreams

This is a strange way to die, Kakashi thinks, when he opens his eyes and sees --

The memory of war, bodies swinging from trees. Broken, half-buried in the cold, inviolable earth, too many children who'd tasted blood before the sweetness of sake or their first kiss. And Obito who stands in judgment with a mouth full of hate, telling Kakashi to shut up and die like the trash that he is.

Trash who couldn't even bother to keep the promise that he made as Obito lay dying under a rock meant for him.

A strange way to die, indeed, with all the stars blotted out by clouds, shadows drinking up every surface, swallowing up the light. And here, a warm rain of blood and Obito's scarred face floating before Kakashi's eyes. One moment there, and the next gone, and Kakashi wonders what strange place this is that Obito's sent him to die, a land flooded with frigid water that runs red when Kakashi collapses forward into the slow, muddy flow.

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He'd decided to brave the weather because poking around the tiny one bedroom apartment just plain got depressing after a while, especially given that poking at Kakashi, this one anyway, tended to yield a lot of well concealed frustration more than anything else.

So, weather it was. He hadn't bothered with an umbrella, he knew with how the wind would kick sideways from time to time that it would be beyond futile, and he'd instead pulled on a long oat in hopes of keeping some of the water out. None of this did anything to obscure his sight though, and his eyes widened and he took in the figure sprawled in the mud.

"Kakashi!"

Same Kakashi, different Kakashi, it really didn't matter, it was definitely one and he sprinted to the man's side, sliding to his knees as he reached to flip him over and made sure he wasn't dead.

[ Ah, well isn't this just wonderful.

Obito's decided to continuing torturing him, with a version of himself that Kakashi could only ever had hoped to meet in dreams. Obito, who says his name the way he always did, who went on saying his name long after they buried a coffin meant for him. His voice, whispering Kakashi's name in the silence after missions, echoing through the darkness to reach him when no one else could. Obito who would never say his name like that again.

Like he wanted Kakashi to live.

Staring up at Obito as the cold seeps through his wet clothing and into his skin, Kakashi thinks he can almost read something like concern that shouldn't be there at all in Obito's eyes. ]

If you're going to do it, you might as well do it already.

[ After all, Kakashi is trash.

And trash doesn't deserve to live. ]

[He scowled, staring down at him for a beat before shaking his head sharply and half pulling him into his lap, eyes going to the wounds before he leaned over him, pressing down on the material to let the rain wash away the mud so he could see just how bad he was hurt. It took a lot to bring down Kakashi, he knew that, and he wasn't about to let this one just keel over on him.]

Don't care and not gonna ask what you're on about. I'm kinda busy making sure you're not about to die, got it?

[He was not liking the looks of the damage either, and he sat up enough to yank off his overshirt, leaving him in just mesh as he pressed the sopping cloth against the most severe of the damage.]

Can you hold it there? If you can, do it for me.

[It would definitely make it easier to carry him if he had both hands.]

[ It makes sense, Kakashi supposes, that Obito would do this to remind him what it was that he lost.

What it was he could have had.

Obito could've found his way back. Could've come home to Konoha, where they could have been together again. And though it wasn't perfect, because the lives of shinobi never are, they could've found a way to be happy together in a world where Rin was alive and by Obito's side. A world Obito wouldn't want to crush into oblivion because all that he had believed in, all that he had loved, had burnt up along with Rin's heart in Kakashi's hand.

So this, this is the slow torture Kakashi deserves to endure before the end.

A penance that can be never paid.

Kakashi doesn't even try to respond to Obito's request to "save his life." Because this false attempt at some sort of salvation is anything but that.

Obito wants to give him just enough glimmer of some sort of hope so that he can crush it out again. ]

Obito... This isn't going to work... You should just end it right now.

[ But that would be merciful, wouldn't it.

And Obito is anything but that. ]

[Annnd clearly Kakashi wasn't going to help, and he'd just ignore the foreboding sensation of his stomach dropping out to secure the shirt on him so it could apply pressure. He'd been paying attention since he got here. He knew that most of these people, people he knew, had never met him, didn't know him. He knew sensei was dead in those places and things were very different.

And the only common factor was him having 'died'. But... Kakashi was talking to him right now. Or who he thought he was. So no, he'd just ignore the crushing sense that this was, indeed, his fault somehow, and instead pick the man into his arms and shove to his feet.]

We're going to a medic.

Edited 2013-04-12 08:34 (UTC)

[ Yes, the Obito he remembered would say something like that.

And it would be a sick, fucked up thing wouldn't it, if Obito really did somehow convince Kakashi in this genjutsu that he had healed him, only to break him down all over again. Just like Itachi had done all those years ago in the black and white world of Tsukuyomi, thousands upon thousands of swords stabbing again and again into his body.

Kakashi doesn't try to struggle or fight, because it's pointless to do so when he's trapped in a genjutsu from which he can't possibly escape. He doesn't have enough chakra to activate Kamui, and even if he did, he's not sure he cares enough to try.

"Trash should just keep its mouth shut and die..." ]

[He had no such qualms, a moment where he glanced around to orient himself before taking them both to the clinic that he was aware of, but had never set foot in. The girl who had been moving toward the door looked startled to see him, but that was understandable, and he pushed Kakashi at her without a second thought.]

Fix him.

[That face! Her alarm was immediate, but the man was bringing Kakashi to her to fix so she could quelch her immediate desire to punch his face in for the moment, for that, and she rushed over instead. Maybe all that time dealing with Kabuto had had some benefits after all.

She was already reaching to start dealing with the damage before she spoke, not even waiting until Obito put him down.]

Sensei! Sensei, are you conscious?

[ This is, quite possibly, the strangest genjutsu Kakashi has ever been caught in.

Instead of responding to the apparition, which clearly isn't Sakura, but a manifestation of his imagination, Kakashi turns his attention to Obito instead. ]

If you think this is a good way of torturing me, you're clearly mistaken.

[ And it's then -- and only then -- that he shifts his weight and more or less manages to stagger onto his feet, pain searing through his body in the process, a hand pushing at Obito's shoulder to put some distance between them. ]

[He scowled at the words, but let the man to his feet, shaking his head.]

I don't know what was just going on with you, but you can shut up now. I'm not going to do anything to you but get her to fix you.

[Her eyes narrowed as she was ignored, and she followed the injured man, tense because of the Uchiha, but able to ignore him for the moment as she reached a hand out to touch one of the seeping wounds, feeding finely tuned chakra into it.]

Sensei, you're bleeding all over the place and ignoring me isn't going to fix it, so if you could sit down that would be great.

[ Somehow, Obito managed to even get the feel of Sakura's chakra down perfectly. Of course he would.

He ignores the fake Sakura and keeps his attention instead on Obito, dropping his arm as he more or less tries to find the will to stay upright. ]

I'm impressed, Obito. This is a very high level genjutsu. I certainly wouldn't have been able to obtain such accuracy. I don't even think Uchiha Itachi could've managed this kind of technique.

[He clutched his head with both hands and made a noise of frustration.]

Why the hell would I bother?!

Just that whole destroying the world to use the moon thing that the you from, I'm guessing our timeline is all over. It really makes me want to break your face, by the way.

[Her tone was almost chipper, a sure sign of just how angry the topic made her, and she keeps on with the healing. Fine sensei, ignore her. She'll fix you while you do that. You'll figure out sooner or late that she's a real girl, hopefully.]

[That jerked his attention away from Kakashi, and his eyes widened.]

What?! No. Fuck no. WHY WOULD I DO THAT?!

Wouldn't know, I just know that you've killed a lot of people, some who I knew really well, really recently before I got here. So no, not happy to see you. Sorry.

[She turned away from him, focusing back on Kakashi, skipping from one wound to the next.]

[That shut him up, and the earlier sinking feeling became a rather intense need to be sick, because more of the bits and pieces and Kakashi was telling him to end him... No, there was no way to handle that and he took a couple steps back, hitting the wall and sliding to sit.

Shit. The only difference between his timeline and the ones where so much went wrong was he was in his and he wasn't in those others. But he was alive when they dug him out. Did someone else dig him out? what happened?!]

Edited 2013-04-12 10:13 (UTC)

[ Any moment now.

Any moment now, the image will fade, and with it, the glimmer of hope, of a past that could have been. Kakashi closes his right eye and lets the red and black world of Sharingan wash over him. He forces himself to watch this, to watch Obito through the red veil of pain that stabs through his head and drips from his left eye, slowly soaking into the fabric of his mask.

The world is as it should be.

Or as it should have been. ]

How long do you plan to keep me trapped here?

[Sakura finally reached up to yank the Hitai-ate down herself when she realized he'd pressed himself so far that it had started bleeding.]

Sensei, you're not in a genjutsu.

[That didn't stop her from glancing over to where Obito had curled up though before moving around Kakashi to start on the wounds on his back.]

Not that you seem to be listening to a word I'm saying. [She just hoped he didn't regret pressing the point later, the man already had enough on his mind.]

[His words were soft, likely because he hadn't really tried to fight his way free of his thoughts.] She's right you know. It's not.

[He didn't look back up though, instead pulling his knees to his chest because he needed to think. Sometimes he hated having a think because when people thought too much they ultimately ended up thinking about things they really didn't want to. This was one of those times, because he'd successfully ignored... everything. He'd ignored that his baby cousins had no idea who he was. Because hey, he was just himself, and that was great right? But why wouldn't they know? Or rather, why would they know if he died? They wouldn't But why didn't the other things happen? He'd heard about sensei. It was inescapable to not hear about it, and the everything that came after. And... none of it made sense, not if he ignored it and the implication that he had to have been the different factor.

But Kakashi seemed to think otherwise, and the man never had learned how to joke, not really, and this would have been in horrible taste besides.]

[ Of course they would insist that this reality is real.

Perhaps Obito hopes to drive Kakashi insane, make him question his grasp on reality before sweeping the proverbial rug right out from under his feet. And what a fine strategy that would be, if Kakashi were a stranger to psychological warfare. But as it is, he's had a little too much experience. This is exactly the kind of mindfuck he would put an enemy through if he truly wanted them to suffer.

The best way to break a man, after all, is not with his body.

Arguing with genjutsu manifestations doesn't seem to be very productive, and it's quite clear to Kakashi that the real Obito has no intention of showing his face anytime soon. He wants Kakashi to suffer, to fall victim to this reality that is not reality at all, and could never be. And maybe that is just what Kakashi deserves for turning Obito into what he had become. For giving him reason to fall into Uchiha Madara's grasp to be molded into the shape of a monster that would destroy the world.

So Kakashi doesn't bother responding, and instead pushes the false Sakura aside.

After all, she isn't actually healing him, anyway. ]

Edited 2013-04-12 21:11 (UTC)

[And... now he was going to actually try to stop her treating him. Not going to fly sensei. She didn't care how much you wanted to argue about reality, but you were going to get patched up. Thus, she promptly ducked under his hand to resume healing, not giving him so much as a moment of consideration in the direction of stopping.]

Sensei, you're badly wounded. I am going to heal you.

[ Seeing as Sakura's not even really there, Kakashi doesn't acknowledge the apparition and turns to walk out the door. ]

[If he was going to be that way, she really had no choice, and she moved forward in a quick double step and pressed her hand to the base of his skull, jolting him quickly with chakra to knock him out. His ignoring her was his own fault, this time.]

--

[By the time the man came around though, it was a new day, and he was in a hospital bed, mask in place but his clothes otherwise changed, his gear piled on the table next to him as she dozed in a chair next to him, light enough that even the slightest movement would wake her up. She'd used a lot of energy patching him up, after all, though he was doubtlessly still sore.]

Edited 2013-04-12 21:50 (UTC)

[ It's a slow process, waking.

A little like pushing against gravity itself. Against the weight of ten thousand red and black eyes, tomoe spinning into infinity, cast against the shadows of falling rocks. He would open his eyes and see it happening over and over again -- the sky coming down and Obito screaming his name. I'll become your eye and see the future for you, he said but he couldn't possibly have predicted or seen Rin's heart in Kakashi's hand and lightning going all through her chest and into her eyes as the life went right out of it.

And there in the distance was Obito screaming her name.

You're trash that can only talk, he said, and all Kakashi could feel was the crushing weight of killing intent.

(And a rock too heavy for him to move.)

Kakashi wakes with a sudden inhale, the blurry ceiling coming into slow focus beyond the dull throb in his eyes. He appears to be in some kind of clinic, which can only mean he somehow survived.

It takes a moment before he realizes there's a presence beside him, and he slowly turns to look at Sakura, who must've spent the entire night beside him. ]

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