(no subject)

[corvus_corax]

[ Whoops-a-daisy. Looks like someone suddenly cannot hear. He's in a restaurant, trying to figure out where he can order a burger and fries, talking way too loud at the manager. ]

I'M SORRY! CAN YOU HEAR ME?! I NEED TO KNOW WHERE I CAN GET A BURGER AND FRIES. LIKE AT MCDONALD'S! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? YOU GOTTA KNOW! IT WAS HERE BEFORE THE SECOND WORLD WAR-- IN THE 1940'S. IT'S BIG AND RED WITH A BIG YELLOW M! SIMPLE M! IT LOOKS LIKE THIS!

[ He draws said 'm' in the air with his finger, but good grief, he can't hear a thing! He can't even hear himself! He doesn't even know if he's speaking English anymore. Oh no; that reminds him of something. ]

DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?! HELLOOO! I NEED. TO FIND. BURGERS. HAMBURGERS. IT'S-- IT'S A MEAT PATTY BETWEEN TWO BUNS AND SOMETIMES YOU GET CHEESE IN IT. AND POTATOES. DEEP FRIED POTATO CHIPS.

[ Apparently one of the employees recognizes potatoes and happens to hold up a few for Shisui to see. At that, Shisui nods excitedly, beaming because somebody understands! ]

YES! YES, POTATOES!

[ Except the manager is now telling his employee to bag a few potatoes and put it on Shisui's bill. He takes it back. Nobody gets it! ]

NO, NO I DON'T WANT YOUR POTATOES! NO, THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PLACE?!

DO YOU KNOW COCA-COLA??

[ Halp |: ]

Comments

[corvus_corax]

Oh no no no-- those are not chips, those are crisps. The crispy things are crisps. [ Wait a minute. ] Waaait wait wait, how did you get me talking like a Brit just then. Chips! They're all chips!

...But I don't care about the chips. I'm in for some meat. It's been a while since I had anything but fish. Bleh. [ Because the only thing he found safe enough to eat was sushi. Everything else looked questionable, and they didn't have take away so he couldn't sit at restaurants trying to figure out how to use chopsticks without looking like an idiot. And as for sushi? They were cheap sushi that gave him a stomach ache. ]

[whatoncewas]

[Watch her wrinkle up her nose in displeasure.] I'm sure someone eats that stuff.

[corvus_corax]

...Eat what? Fish or meat?


.....Why are you giving me the crinkly face?

[whatoncewas]

Fish is as close as I'd even think of getting to meats. Those tend to taste terrible.

[corvus_corax]

Well that's because you haven't tried an authentic hamburger. What are you, an almost-vegetarian? The Itachi I know cooked all sort of meats-- though he might have liked his peas and carrots a little too much as well... now that I think about it.

So where are we going?

[whatoncewas]

I can't stand red meats in any form and white meats are... almost tolerable.

My home.

[corvus_corax]

Aww, you don't know what you're missing~

Oh-- Wait, is Fugaku going to be there? [ In which case, no thanks, he will turn around and leeeeeeave~ ]

[whatoncewas]

[She took two steps back and grabbed his wrist, staring up at him.] Father is on a mission. Come.

...

.....

I've been away long enough anyway, the little one is probably getting into trouble by now.

[corvus_corax]

[ There is no escape! ]

Little one? [ Sasuke? Or does Itachi have a kid? Gosh, that would just be... awkward. ]

[whatoncewas]

Yes, I've ah... adopted a toddler version of you. [She blushed and continued to pull him along.]

[corvus_corax]

You-- [ WHAT? |: ]

There is a toddler version of me?! [ How embarrassing! Shisui is sort of trying to walk slowly and run away or something, but then again, he's also curious. ]

Are you sure I should meet him, er--

[whatoncewas]

[She looked back to him with a huff, releasing him.]

If you don't want to come with me, just say so.

[corvus_corax]

[ He needs to think things over. Apparently this process only takes him about two seconds before he follows her anyway. ]

I'll come. If you promise not to introduce me to myself--

[whatoncewas]

I didn't intend to. Kid has enough ideas without trying to con you into things. [She shook her head with a little grin.] He'd probably light you on fire anyway.

[corvus_corax]

[ Light him on fire, eh? Why did this make him burst out laughing? ]

Well now. Sure sounds like Uchiha Shisui if you ask me~

My Dad used to tell me I had a thing against frogs. Whenever I'd see one, I'd try and shoot it with my BB gun. It's like they were my arch-enemies. I don't remember any of that, but I still think it might have been pretty funny.

[whatoncewas]

....Let's just say that there's been a serious drop int he frog population since I found him, shall we?

[corvus_corax]

Ahahaha! Atta boy~

[ Still laughing ]

Guess I haven't change much.

[whatoncewas]

[She gave him an amused little smile.] Guess not.

/timeskips :|

[corvus_corax]

[ He follows her almost to the house, but hesitates by the porch, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. ]

Hey... I know I said I'd come inside, but I figured I had a few things to do.

[ Okay, that was a blatant lie. ]

Well, okay. Maybe it has something to do with running into mini-me or something, but y'know. Another time? It was nice meeting you.

[ He's already walking backwards and away ]

And remember, anything can happen, yeah? It's not over till it's over.

[ He jabs his fist to his own chest and then holds it out to her, flashing her the 'peace' sign before turning and walking away. ]

I'll stop by some other time!

[shishoo]

[ Meanwhile, there's a little rascal, butt naked, waiting for her at the door, beaming with his arms raised for her to pick him up. Don't mind him. He'd just been trying to put out a fire he started in the room two minutes ago |: See that smoke? Ahem ]

[whatoncewas]

[Given she had a moment of trying to not have her feelings hurt by the man bailing on her, it was good the kid was close at hand, and she turned her full focus on the kid, shaking her head as she picked him up.]

Alright mister, what did you do?

[shishoo]

[ Here's hoping the older him would return someday.

Itachi gets a kiss on the cheek for picking him up, and Shisui delves right into his story of how-I-burned-the-bed right ]

There was a fwog on your bed so I fwogged it. But the bed is very hot now.

[ There is also flames licking the door frame |: But neither of this is as interesting to Shisui as the bag of potatoes in Itachi's hand. ]

PotatoooooooooooooOOOOoooOOOO~ [ grabby hands at potatoes~ ]

[whatoncewas]

[Well that was bad. She handed the bag to the child and swung him to the ground, stepping forward in one move with her hands flying through seals for a suiton jutsu, because NO.]

[shishoo]

[ Oh no! He's sad that he's been set down, and pouting, sits on the floor. He brings the bag of potatoes to his chest and hugs it, pouting harder as he watches her fly up to put out the fire. ]

[whatoncewas]

[She yanked the now-wet blankets to the floor and sighed, shoulders dropping before she moved to pick up the little boy.]

What have I told you about Katon in the house Shisui?